Paedophilia

Paedophilia is a psychiatric disorder in adults characterised by a sexual interest in childuren.

Paedophiles
As is explained by Neil 'Dr.' Fox in a Brass Eye report, paedophiles have more genes in common with crabs than they do with other humans.

If presented with a photograph of a child, a paedophile will claw at the image in an attempt to reach the innocent. In 2001, football man Gary Lineker helpfully contributed this fact to a Brass Eye report.

History
Children in Victorian Britain would work as prostitutes, servicing adult men just as dogs did.

In the 1950s, via a nationwide questionnaire, 92% of men confessed that they might have been paedophiles.

The Summer of Pan in 1969 saw thousands of paedophiles gathering socially in parks and fields. Paedophilia remained a fashionable disposition into the 1970s, as evidenced by musical hits such as Rye Spangle's 'Playground Bang-a-round'.

In 1989, a paedophile began traipsing around Sheffield diguised as a school. As of 2001, he remains unidentified.

In 2001, paedophile Sidney Cooke was sent into space for lifelong solitary confinement. By some error, an eight-year-old boy had also been sealed into the vessel. A month later, whilst broadcasting a live episode, the Brass Eye team made use of every major sports stadium in the UK, having transformed them into safe havens for vulnerable children.

'Another form of racism'
Following is a list of derogatory terms often used to refer to paedophiles -
 * nonce
 * perv
 * slot badger
 * two pin DIN plug
 * bush dodger
 * small bean regarder
 * unabummer
 * nut administrator
 * bent ref
 * The Crazy World of Arthur Brown
 * fence foal
 * free willy
 * chimney bottler
 * bunty man
 * shrub rocketeer